Reactions to dance audition, 1/30/16

Reactions to dance audition, 1/30/16

Just got out of a dance audition. Overall it went well. I dropped a bit more of the choreography than i'd like (mostly the fast combos with the arms), but I had a lot of fun going super expressive in the slower portions, and had a ball on the improv portions.

Overall, I'm really happy with the effort I put out, and happy I gave it my all. Postings for who got nabbed will be posted at 4Pm.

I'm not particularly expecting to have a slot( as i said, i dropped more choreo than i'd like) but it's not entirely impossible either. (although I'm suspecting it to be very, very unlikely.)

Just got the results from the dance audition I did today. The results are:

Exactly what I predicted. Not cast.

But lols. What's really, really important to note, is that compared to the auditions I did last year (when I had 0 dance courses, working on the first , compared to the two and working on a third under my belt this year).

See, last year the capability gap between me and the kids, was "wow my core conditioning is comparable, perhaps better than theirs. Shame I can't keep up with the choreography. I look like a drunk duck."

This year, the capability gap between me and the kids, was more like. "wow. My core conditioning is most decidedly on the upper edge of the room here. I'm able to nab a lot of the choregraphy, and my expressive capacity is damn good. Such a shame that i'm missing a lot of the fast combos that involve my hands and feet at the same time. Also, my groundwork, and my memorization skills are still sub-par"

Which, as you might have noticed, is a tad more DETAILED. That's a good sign. See, I've played me a lot, and I mean a lot of megaman, monster hunter, demon souls, and dark souls. All games known for their unrelenting, punishing difficulty, that require the player memorize and counter attack patterns designed with "screw the player" as a guiding theme.

And I've gotten very, very good at those games. Very good. Hell, just this break, I nailed the last giant in Dark Souls II. And by nailed it, i mean "over the course of a single night, mastered his attack patterns to the point where I one-v-one'd him, and defeated him, despite the fact this attacks were all capable of one-shotting me. Oh yeah. And I hadn't found the emerald herald at that point, because no hand-holding this time around. Hence I had not leveled a single goddamn time at that point.

I'm at the point, where i can see the capability gaps between me and the other students. I'm at the point, where I can see what they have that I don't. I'm also at the point.... Where spamming some training, and learning how to use my meager capabilities to utterly out-play their supposedly 'superior' capabilities. Is in reach.

Just as surely, as the "last giant" in Dark Souls II fell to my hands....

Immma gonna nail me a dance audition and get on that goddamn stage next semester. smile emoticon

Scene study. Reaction to "white privilege II"

Scene study. Reaction to "white privilege II"

emotionally, speaking that piece makes me feel ashamed of how wicked the world is. Angry that people hurt each other so. Also offended that i'm being lumped in with a bunch of asshats due to the mere coincidence of sharing a skin color with them. Also very, very upset that people have been using that as an excuse to hurt each other for so long.

scene study Journal: class 2

scene study Journal: class 2

Today was a "work on your own day" My partner and I worked really well together on our scene. It seems like it's got a good structure, and is heavily focused on family drama, and the iraq war. i feel a strong connection with my char, roy. i'll put up some more detailed notes on my thoughts later, when I have a tad more time.

Devised Theater Journal: Class I

Devised Theater Journal: Class I

Our visiting professor, John is from England. He ran us through some improv exercises. Apparently his class will focus on improv technique, spontaneity and research. i'm down with this, as those are essentially my core skills as a performer. This is gonna be fun

Scene Study and Realism Journal: class 1

Scene Study and Realism Journal: class 1

The material we covered today, focused on Kim's acting teaching philosophy. It seems she works a lot with Stanislavsky. She is focused on building a sense of community, acceptance, and training analysis of character, and development of practical skills as a group. We memorized the classes names, and did some energy building exercises. Was a lot of fun.

Hip-Hop Dance: journal 1

Hip-Hop Dance: Journal 1

Other than the usual syllabus stuff on the first day of class, we went over some of the basic hip-hop history and terms. It originated in the bronx. It's themes are Mcing Djing, (two more. I'll have to ask about that. dance types used in it, are popping, locking, b-boying, and.... Damn. Need to get that down later too. Shoulda had a pencil with me that day.

We started training our first routine after warmups. I noted that the warmups were familar. Our teacher seemed very focused on step-by-step procedural instruction for the routine, and seems very committed to taking questions. I like that. The class also ended with a cooldown routine.

Response to "white privilege II" Scene study and realism.

Response to "white privilege II" Scene study and realism.

The reason i support the Black lives matter movement, is the same reason I support the LGBT community. It's the same reason I support my Native American friends who also suffer systematic oppression and brutality from the local police. It's because i am just as much an outsider to american culture as they are, albeit less visibly so.

I've had a mental health diagnosis since my 20's. As someone who's been given a diagnosis of schizophrenia (falsely, I may add), I know what indignity feels like. I know what it feels like for authority figures to sell me off. I know what it's like to have my voice be negated. I've been in the local psych center three times. 

Given the choice between that and the legal system, I'd rather deal with the legal system, because at least in that, i get a lawyer. Once you are in the mental health system, you have no legal rights. Sure, they SAY you have legal rights. But just try to enforce them. Try to enforce your right to refuse treatment (in manner of being forced to take life-threatening pills for conditions you don't have) when you live in a mental health ward, with 20 people, have no privacy and no means of leaving. No means of gaining the help of a lawyer. 

No means of getting effective support from outside. On top of that, most people on the outside refuse to believe that the doctors are in the wrong, because you are the one with the mental health history, remember??

So that being said, since it's really, really hard to find a group that will campaign for the rights of the mentally ill. (and very, very easy to find groups that will campaign to give them fewer rights) I've decided to be the change that i want to see in the world. 

I'm not rich. I've never earned more that 15K in a single year. I'm not protected particularly well by the justice system, as I cannot afford a lawyer to protect my legal rights when they are violated. (and they often are)

But, regardless, I fight for those in need. I've marched in two LGBT pride parades, not because I am gay, or even have any family members who are, but because they needed my help, and I could. I constantly post on FB about how awful the police brutality is in the US, particularly against minorities, such as African Americans, and Native Americans. I've gotten in quite a few bitter arguments with people to try to explain that yes, it's a big deal, and yes it is a very, very real problem.

Even before the events of last semester I was campaigning for change on this campus. MLK day last spring semester made me sick. The admins were talking up and down about numbers this, and numbers that and how great it was to have a lot of 'diversity'. I in a public forum called em out. I said that it doesn't matter how many people of subculture X/Y/Z you have in a given area, what makes a difference is how well they are treated. If there physical, academic, safety and emotional needs are being supported, than the school is being a good host to them. If they are not than the school is failing them, and is part of the problem.

Last semester, there was a more of a "campus diversity workshop" well prior to the protests. Much to my dismay, it was poorly advertised, and sparsely attended. Some discussion of native american, African american and LGBT needs were discussed. The common consensus of the club representatives in the room, was that the school was very, very good at outwardly making a big show of helping minorities of all kinds, but very, very piss-poor ate actually giving them the support they needed. (I could go on with specific examples, but lols. Maybe another time). I also noted that there was no one there who had been asked to represent mental health issues, ageism, or those with learning disabilities. It fell on me that day to represent the needs of those groups.

During the protests, I was appealed at the school's official response on the matter. I was pissed at how callously the local police treated the situation, and how we had to bring in so many police from outside the area to cover security, and even then we had to spread them very, very thin to cover all of the required events. 

I also offered my services as someone who knows the local politics, and has friends in other campuses who may be wiling to set up protests on sister campuses. I did this because I am an enemy of injustice anywhere, and when it happens in my hometown, I am very, very motivated to oppose it. Regrettably, i was not taken up on my offers.

At the beginning, middle and end of every day, I am a local, poor, white-trash, humanist with a mental health history. I have no privilege to defend, and I have little expectation of others successfully acting to defend my human rights. So I march with my brothers and sisters, to do battle against injustice, wherever, and whenever I find it.